I feel like so many (especially young) people here on tumblr were beaten over the head again and again with “believe the victims, stop asking them to prove their victimhood” and instead of understanding that this means “don’t dogpile victims because you like the abuser” instead took it to the no-nuance end of the pool and turned it into “if you hear something bad about someone don’t go looking for sources or context” and those are not the same things
You should look at sources. Always. Taking a moment to say “wait, who said that? what happened?” isn’t victim blaming, it isn’t siding with an abuser, its taking a step back to understand a whole picture, in its context.
When you do this,
- you are actually a better ally than just knee-jerk, superficial, performative support.
- you can approach with nuance.
- you can avoid speaking over them, and learn how to be a better, more supportive ally.
- you can avoid repeating old claims that have already been either addressed or disproven.
- you can avoid propaganda and disinformation, which not only serves to undermine whoever its about, but it undermines everyone else.
This post is about political disinformation, but when people get away with making false allegations about abuse or racism or homophobia or any other gross behavior it undermines the positions of actual victims because people who are prone to bad faith can say “ah, that was a scam, victims are scammers”. When you make false claims about politicians, you undermine the political process and allow people who are prone to bad faith to say “see I don’t need to participate”.
I know we hate checking facts and sources here on the internet, but that’s the whole point of the internet. Information is available, and you should be checking your sources before you make claims about people.
Considering how many abusers weaponize this exact thing against their victims, it’s even more important to understand the situation in its entirety if you want to avoid “siding with the abuser”.
(via veliseraptor)
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