what if cheque please took place in oxford and bitty was from scotland and his twitter was all in that scottish… dialect w/ tweets like “magine callin yer maw right quick in tae mornin caus yer ovens gon tae shite..” and “me n ma mates cuttin about tae pettin zoo ma mate jack buried in wee chicks…. this lad..”
and the whole team would do that thing when british young men overreact to everything like [ransom voice] asked bitty to bake a pie for me and he did it!! the absolute madman!!!!!!
On the one hand, this is a hilarious AU concept to me, because Scottish politeness bears very little resemblance to US Southern politeness, so you could have a whole bunch of fun with that by either a) making Bitty incongruous in his home environment or b) expressing his native sweetness in particularly Scottish ways. Though either way, you’d probably have to change what it is he’s baking, because “pies” in the UK generally are of the meat variety - like, those massive berry and cream and what-the-fuck-ever pies you have in the States? Yeah, the UK and Australia don’t really do those so much.
On the other hand, THAT DIALECT IS INACCURATE AND IT PAINS ME. Because if this is going to be done, it needs to be done right. Like. OP is mostly correct, and I’ll give credit for that, but the form of Scots being used in those tweets isn’t (inasmuch as such a thing exists) mainstream Scottish, but a more Northern/Doric dialect, which is something quite different. For instance: ‘tae’ is a form of ‘too’, not ‘the’, so ‘tae pettin zoo’ is… not right. You wouldn’t really call someone ‘right quick’ in the same context, either - that’s more an English (in the sense of British) expression. (In my head, it comes out in a Yorkshire accent because that’s what I associate it with, but it’s more general than that.)
Basically if you wanted to write a Scottish!Bitty who was kind of (by Southern US standards) genteel in his mannerisms, I’d suggest something like a Morningside Edinburgh background and accent, which is very different. Like, you could definitely do him as Doric or northern Scots or whatever you wanted, but it wouldn’t just change his speech patterns, is what I’m saying - it would, of necessity, change how he expresses hospitality and manners. Also, that “young British men overreacting” thing tends to be, specifically, white British men from particular urban areas, which would work for someone like Holster but probably not Rans.
In conclusion, the UK is fucking geographically tiny compared to America but nonetheless contains a startlingly comparable density of regional accents and mannerisms, not all of which are immediately obvious if you haven’t ever visited or lived there.
(Note: I am Australian, but just spent five years living in the UK, predominantly in Scotland but also in England. So if any actual UK natives chime in and correct me here, listen to them instead!)
Yes and no. Scottish Twitter voice as per the Insult Trump game, for example, is mainly Central Belt accent and dialect, I’d say, with just a wee bit of influence from the Highlands… maybe. I’d be interested to know how many folk going full Scots there actually speak like that all the time irl. In my experience… It’s like code switching but with a dial. With just a few wee tells that are pure Weegee or pure Leith (or Falkirk or Wishaw or wherever,) ye do draw it from yer own roughest nearby environs, but much of it’s down yo how native tv shows and movies like Trainspotting or Still Game or Scotch and Wry, even stuff like Whisky Galore, all kind of feed into an amalgamated broad Scottish voice that’s got local variations but nicks whatever works best from wherever. “Ya big bawbag!” is very Glasgow to me, but could be Leith just as easily. You want to dial it up you go for widnae instead of wouldnae for wouldn’t. And irl might use any of those dependent on where you are, but with it being less about region, more about roughness, talking broader so’s not to get chibbed by some radge wee ned. Ye might go “yer ain” for “your own” naturally with yer mates but have folks who tell ye to talk proper. You might talk and think in Standard English one moment but slip intae Scots the next as kind of a fuck you ya wank attitude switch. It’s a change in register, I mean–part of why it works so well for throwing shade. It brooks no affectation, has zero concern for fucking propriety. Hence the politeness difference. That voice is never fuckin polite, just friendly if yer no a shitebag, eh? If yer pure brand new. Part of this comes from said to and film representations mining the culture, working class disregard for middle class wank, as source of humour.
Anyway, aye, that OP voice is… no bad for a first try but it disnae work as is. It’d be mair like “magine cawin yer maw first thing in the morn cuz yer ovens fukt.” Gone to shit isn’t really a native idiom so shite sounds odd there. Gone tae fuck would maybe work, but it’s encroaching on the territory of “get tae fuck” which is we fucking havin it. A principle I shall call Begbie’s Razor ultimately applies whereby if it’s fukt, it’s fukt. It’s no fuckin seen better days or fuckin In need of a bit of fuckin TLC, man, it’s just fuckin fukt. Again, Scottish Twitter voice is a nae fucks given voice. Nae fuckin dancin around the point, cause that’s just fuckin wank.
reblogging for Hal, because YES
(via halduncan)
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Please let me know when you write this, friends…
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