What Happens Next: A Gallimaufry

melancholic romantic comic cynic. bi & genderqueer. fantasy writer. sysrae on ao3.

in which my husband tries to describe the merits of his squeeze bottle of sweetened condensed milk

  • Husband: It's like having cream farted into my mouth by a sphincter!
  • Me: ...
  • Me: Take a moment to appreciate why that doesn't sound like a good thing.
  • Husband: Whatever. It's addictive - like Slurm!
  • Me: Again, that comes from an anus.
  • Husband: *shrugs, continues squeezing sweetened condensed milk into his mouth*
  • Husband: You can't make me ashamed.
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